Monday, 2 March 2020


3 or 4 of us going to see The Bootleg Beatles at a sort of Wetherspoons type pub place. Myself, Kay Emm andmy friend Dee Bee(?) and...? There are 2 staff on the door and the guy who speaks to me looks a bit like a young John McVie of Fleetwood Mac. He's chatty and smiling. We go up the steps and enter through a set of glazed timber double doors. It's a fairly generic pub inside and approaching the bar there's a small stage, raised by a single step, squeezed in the right hand corner - it's carpeted just the same as the floor and a few mike stands can be seen on it. I think the band are on in 15 minutes. I suddenly think to ask Kay Emm if she wants some earplugs. I can go to my (old?) workplace as I have lots of them there. I can picture bags and bags of them. I'm worried the office will be locked so leave quickly-

It is practically right next door and within seconds I'm going up a tight, winding staircase. I meet Eee (?) and my friend Dee Emm coming down the stairs. It's ages since I've seen them and we are happy to see each other. I say hello, ask how they are and if the office is locked for the night. Dee Emm says it is but that she will go back up the stairs with me and let me in. On the landing at the office - Dee Emm has gone - the storm doors are open, the door behind is open and the office is bustling. I can hear the chatty voices from outside. I go in and it is busy. Lots of young, smartly dressed people standing about talking. Lots of bustle. In a rush I kind of push my way through. There's a young girl standing facing me - she looks a little like Millie Bobby Brown from Stranger Things - and I say "excuse me", planting my hands firmly on her shoulders and guiding her to the right to let me pass. The second I do this I realise it could be deemed as inappropriate (and obviously) unwanted contact. Panicking somewhat I make a point of doing the same thing to a young guy also standing in my way. I again place my hands firmly on his shoulders - though he has his back to me - and shuffle him to the side to pass, hoping this will compensate-

I enter my old room and approach a tall cupboard with a narrow double door set. It seems to be angled, as if it had been built for a corner location - but it stands somewhere in the middle. I then see myself - though I look nothing like myself - opening the cupboard to look. This is composed like a movie, the contents are unseen while my reaction is everything. There are no plugs? I say it's full of guns. A row of shining, polished silver guns. I ask who this cupboard belongs to. Gee Dee says that it is Ian's. Wow! I ask what he is like, does he live alone? Gee says he is overweight and we agree he fits the profile (of a would-be killer). I want to know if he lives with his parents, my thinking being they will help ground him and balance out his unpleasant urges. Do I then take some earplugs? As I leave I have a very awkward, apologetic conversation with the young girl. She is visibly embarrassed - bizarrely she seems to colour so much I think suddenly she is British Asian(?) for a moment - as I ramble on about my inappropriate behaviour in putting my hands on her shoulders-

I head down the stairs and out. Seems most of the office is trooping in that direction and I am worried if we turn up en masse then we will not be allowed entry to the gig - ideally we should stagger our arrival to avoid this. I am conscious of my wearing a striped shirt and a jacket on top. I have a kids' sticker/activity book hidden up my shirt. When we emerge into the day it is lightly raining and I have to really focus to zip up my jacket. The sticker book slips down and I take it out, presenting it to the friendly guy on the door. He's right into it. I ask him if he has kids and he says he does not. Flicking through it he says he'll get to it in his spare time-

I go into the pub. It seems much bigger inside now - The Bootleg Beatles can be seen through the windows, playing to the left of the doors, their backs to us - and there are plenty stylish girls in op art dresses dancing and grooving. There are less tables and seats, and those there are of the taller, semi-barstool variety. The front third or so of the pub is raised a step up with a timber balustrade around. The band are playing (to my bemusement) the song 'Mony Mony'. Okay... I go over to the far left where Kay Emm and some others sit (though I know it is her Kay does not look now like herself). She has my earplugs in and looks pained. I take out the other pair of earplugs - blue foam ones, matching those she's wearing. Is it too loud? She says not, but indicates her neck, just below the jawline, and the side of her head-

Tommy James & The Shondells - Mony Mony

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